One day while reading to Noah I noticed small white dots on his hand. Upon examination, I found more dots on his other hand and on the tops of both of his feet. He also had a few in random spots around his ankle. I could not figure out what they were. They were not red or puffy. When I touched them, he didn't act like it hurt him. It took me several days but then it hit me. The little white dots were scars. They were little scars from the many times he had been poked and prodded for blood samples and ivs. It really upset me to see those little white dots. So many bad memories came flooding back, especially the one where he had an IV in his head.
After awhile, I realized that these scars should not be making me sad. Instead, they show me how strong and brave my little boy is. It shows me how stubborn he is to survive and that he is a fighter The scars are the badges of a survivor and should be celebrated.
Everyone has scars. Some are easily visible and some are not. Some are on the skin and some are emotional scars. One can dwell on the pain from these scars or one can learn from them.
I am so hoping there will be no more blood samples, no more IVs, no more scars. But if there are, they will be badges of honor and I will kiss each one with love and pride.